Okay before I get into my polished post let me just say that I am a bit frustrated lol. Earlier today someone posted in a group that I’m in and asked for insight/help. I will post it as a quote below:
I’m new here but I’ve been reading lots of posts on here. I am struggling with life right now I’m sleeping on couches, I never know where my next meal is coming from, I just started a new job, my 2nd day my car fkd up I’ve missed 2 days going back to work tonight. What can help me be more productive atp idc what happens, I’ve tried the religious thing & needless to say it’s not working for me. My energy is so off I need a remedy & quick! Help someone.
The first couple of responses that I saw annoyed the fuck out of me. Simple: Raise your vibration. Be more Positive or think more positive some bullshit like that. AND I will say I’m not anti-positive bullshit lol be positive all you want but when you fucking read the above and you post something so vague without ANY help at all.. like NO solution just be positive and raise your vibe you dumb bitch… Like WHAT? no. We’re not here for that. Now let’s polish…. OKAY? okay.
Let me start by saying this: if you’ve ever been told to “raise your vibration” or to “just think positive” when you’re going through a hard time, you’re not alone. And if you’ve felt like those words were dismissive, unhelpful, or just downright frustrating—you’re absolutely right.
Recently, someone posted in a witchcraft group asking for help. They were facing some real, tough life challenges: sleeping on couches, not knowing where their next meal was coming from, dealing with car troubles, and trying to keep a job. Their energy was off, and they were desperate for a remedy. The responses they got? Variations of “raise your vibration” and “think positive.”
So, let me be blunt: that kind of response is not helpful. It’s toxic positivity wrapped up in spiritual marshmallow-fluff.
Telling someone who’s struggling to raise their vibration is like telling someone drowning to swim harder without throwing them a life raft. It implies that the reason they’re struggling is that their energy isn’t high enough or that they’re not “positive” enough. This is what we call spiritual gaslighting. It blames the person for their own suffering and glosses over the very real, very human challenges they’re dealing with.
What is Spiritual Gaslighting?
Spiritual gaslighting happens when people use spiritual language to invalidate or minimize someone’s real-life struggles. Phrases like “raise your vibration,” “you just need to align with the Universe,” or “you’re not manifesting the right way” are all examples of this. While these statements might seem well-meaning, they can make people feel like they’re failing spiritually because their lives aren’t perfect, which is not how witchcraft—or life—works.
When someone is posting about serious problems—like housing instability, food insecurity, or employment issues—telling them to raise their vibration or be more positive is not just unhelpful, it’s downright harmful. It places the responsibility for their struggle on them and ignores the reality that sometimes, life is just hard, and it’s okay to not be “vibing high” 24/7.
Raising Vibration vs. Practical Help
Now, don’t get me wrong. There’s nothing inherently wrong with the idea of raising your vibration or focusing on positive energy. But when that’s your only advice to someone in crisis, it’s a problem. If you truly believe in the idea of raising vibration, explain how to do it. Offer practical tools, like grounding techniques, energy-clearing rituals, or even simple spells that don’t require a lot of resources. Help them reconnect with their power in ways that are accessible and meaningful.
And let’s also acknowledge that sometimes what people need isn’t a spiritual solution—they need real-world help. They need to know where to find community resources, where to ask for help, and that it’s okay to lean on others without shame. Witchcraft can be powerful, but it’s not a magic fix for everything. If someone’s struggling, sometimes the best spell you can offer is support and empathy.
What I Offered as Help to this Individual:
1. Get it All Out on Paper
Start by writing down everything. All the challenges, all the BS you’re facing right now. Then, write out what you want—what you’re working towards. It might feel overwhelming at first, but once you’ve got everything in front of you, you can start breaking it down. Look at that list and see if there’s one thing you can tackle that might knock out 2 or 3 problems at once. Focus on the domino effect—if fixing the car is going to help with work and housing, that’s your priority. Baby steps, but each one counts.
2. Tap into Local Resources
I know it’s hard to ask for help sometimes, but right now? You need support, and there’s no shame in that. Look into community resources—food banks, shelters, car repair assistance programs—whatever is available in your area. Even if it’s uncomfortable, remember that asking for help isn’t a weakness, it’s a strength. You’re showing up for yourself and doing what’s necessary to get through this.
3. Shift Focus to the Tangible
You’re not in this situation because you’re not “vibrating high enough” (seriously, screw that mindset). But while you’re tackling all these practical issues, there’s no harm in adding some spiritual support to the mix. If it helps to feel like you’re clearing some of that heavy energy, here are a couple of low-effort, low-cost spells you can try:
- Ammonia Jar Reversal Spell: This spell is super simple and doesn’t require anything fancy. It’s a way to reverse negative energy or situations, so if you’re feeling stuck, this can help shift things. Look it up on YouTube—there are plenty of guides out there, and you probably already have the materials at home.
- Trinka Five Spell: It’s an old charm to bring in financial abundance or luck when you’re in a bind. The best part? It’s simple. You don’t need much more than the words and your intention.
4. Remember Your Worth
This one’s huge. No matter how tough things are right now, none of this reflects your worth. You deserve stability, peace, and progress. This rough patch? It’s not forever. And you’re going to make it through—not by raising your damn vibration, but by confronting reality head-on and doing the best with what you’ve got. You’re already surviving, which means you’re stronger than a lot of people even realize.
So yeah, don’t let anyone gaslight you into thinking you’re the problem. You’re not. You’re doing everything you can with what you have, and you’ve got people who see that and are here to support you in a real way.
This leads to my next talking point. So of course people were passionate about the types of response of ‘Raise Vibes, Be Positive’ and rightfully so, people called that out and I’m glad but then someone did pose a comment which I thought was meh fair I suppose.
For everyone who doesn’t like the “raise your vibration” posts: why post in a witchcraft group? Literally witchcraft is energy manipulation. 🤷🏻♀️
My response I thought was decent but did it come across slightly cunty? Maybe. I can never tell lol. You can tell me though, it’s just us WitchBitch Friends 😉 So this was my actual response:
Okay, let’s break this down. The comment you’re addressing comes from a place of misunderstanding what’s really going on here, and honestly, it’s a prime example of spiritual gaslighting.
First off, yes, witchcraft is about manipulating energy, but let’s not oversimplify things. When someone says, “Just raise your vibration,” or “Think positive,” without considering the real struggles someone’s going through, it’s dismissive and toxic. It reduces everything to a shallow level of “if you’re not vibing high, it’s your fault your life sucks,” and that’s simply not how it works.
Spiritual gaslighting happens when someone weaponizes spiritual concepts—like raising vibrations or thinking positive—to silence or invalidate a person’s very real pain or struggles. It’s essentially blaming the individual for their circumstances instead of acknowledging that, hey, sometimes life just sucks, and people are allowed to feel that without being told they’re not “positive” enough. It’s no different from telling someone with depression to just smile more. It’s damaging, unhelpful, and completely misses the point.
When people are going through difficult times, like not knowing where their next meal is coming from or struggling to find a safe place to sleep, telling them to “raise their vibration” is tone-deaf. What does that even mean in practice? Raising your vibration and positivity are concepts rooted in New Age Thought and Law of Attraction, not traditional witchcraft. Witchcraft doesn’t require you to be high-vibe all the time. In fact, it’s often about working with the raw, messy, and even dark aspects of life. It’s about transformation, not just slapping on a fake smile and pretending everything’s fine.
If someone truly believes in the “raise your vibration” concept, then by all means, explain it in a practical, meaningful way. Teach them how to balance their energy, how to ground themselves, how to work with their circumstances rather than dismiss them. But don’t sit there and gaslight them into thinking it’s their fault they’re struggling because they didn’t maintain the right “vibe.”
And this is where we need to disconnect witchcraft from New Age fluff like the Law of Attraction and the whole Positive Vibes Only movement. While some witches may incorporate elements from these practices, they are not the foundation of witchcraft. Witchcraft can be raw, gritty, and deeply empowering without needing to sugarcoat reality or pretend everything’s okay. It’s about real energy work, which sometimes means facing and transmuting the heavy, chaotic stuff—not just vibing high 24/7.
The bottom line? Telling someone to “raise their vibration” without context or understanding of their situation is spiritual gaslighting at its finest. If you really want to help, go deeper. Offer practical advice, explain what you mean, and stop hiding behind fluffy one-liners that do more harm than good. Witchcraft is about power, transformation, and sometimes, diving into the shadows—not pretending they don’t exist.
Let’s Talk About Witchcraft vs. New Age Thought
So, as you can see from my above response I think We need to address a bigger issue: the blending of witchcraft with New Age concepts like the Law of Attraction and “Positive Vibes Only.” While some witches (I do enjoy applying some law of attraction techniques in my craft) might incorporate elements of these practices, it’s important to understand that they are not foundational to witchcraft.
Witchcraft isn’t about pretending everything is light and love all the time. It’s about working with energy—yes—but it’s also about confronting the shadows, acknowledging the messiness of life, and transforming through those experiences. The idea that you have to be in a constant state of high vibration (what does that even mean? and who determines it?) to succeed or to manifest your desires is a New Age construct, not traditional witchcraft.
Witchcraft can be raw. It’s not always pretty, and it certainly doesn’t require you to plaster on a fake smile and pretend like everything’s fine when it’s not. Sometimes, it’s about sitting with the discomfort, working through the difficult emotions, and finding power in the struggle. Witchcraft allows space for all of it—the light and the dark.
Why This Matters
We need to be more mindful of how we respond to people in the witchcraft community who are going through hard times. If your go-to advice is “raise your vibration,” take a moment to ask yourself: what do you actually mean by that? And more importantly, is it the best advice for someone who’s struggling with real-world issues?
Instead of defaulting to empty phrases, let’s dig deeper. Offer practical, tangible solutions. Help people reconnect with their own power in ways that are grounded in reality, not just spiritual jargon. And most importantly, remember that everyone’s path is different. Not every witch is going to resonate with New Age principles or the Law of Attraction—and that’s okay. Witchcraft is diverse, and there’s no one right way to practice.
In the end, let’s be real with each other. Life is hard sometimes, and pretending like we can manifest our way out of every challenge isn’t helping anyone. Witchcraft gives us the tools to face life’s difficulties, not avoid them. Let’s use those tools in a way that uplifts and empowers—without sugarcoating the real work that needs to be done.
Love this!